"This I Believe..." is an international project engaging people in writing, sharing, and discussing the core values that guide their daily lives. These short statements of belief, written by people from all walks of life, are archived and featured on public radio in the United States and Canada, as well as in regular broadcasts on NPR. The project is based on the popular 1950s radio series of the same name hosted by Edward R. Murrow. We on the Therapist Well-Being Committee want to share some of our thoughts with you. Won't you please join us? Send in your contribution (see below) or visit their website to hear something from the archives (www.thisibelieve.org).

This I Believe... from Alice Sklar, MFT

...That wellness is an ideal toward which most therapists aspire. Its literal meaning is different for every individual but physical, psychological, and social health are usually components of its definition. Because wellness is an ideal it is rarely achieved. We have to strive for it. It requires us to reassess ourselves regularly and to seek feedback from others in order to enjoy the reward of attaining or regaining it from time to time.

If we were perpetually well, it would inhibit our motivation to seek new ways to manage and change our lives. That would inhibit some of our most creative moments, and creative moments are so very precious. I'm reminded of the many artists whose struggles to overcome illness and tragedy created lasting works of art.

Personal growth occurs when we strive for wellness because we learn about ourselves throughout the process. My personal struggles have led me to greater depth and understanding. They have also broadened my appreciation of others. A small example: I had back surgery in December. Not being allowed to drive left me uncomfortably isolated. After a while I did something very uncharacteristic and difficult for me; I reached out to friends and colleagues for support. The flood of good will that I received was overwhelming. I'll never find it as hard to say "help" again.

I don't expect to always enjoy wellness any more than I expect to live forever. But I hope to have the courage to continue to work against the natural tendency toward non-wellness, and I hope to be able to encourage others to take the same active stance in their lives.

This I Believe... From Mary Jo Trusso, MFT

...That most of us have a monitoring system, sometimes conscious and sometimes not, that helps us be aware of what is good for us. In my therapy practice this shows up when I close a few files at the end of a long day and say, "I'll finish the paper work tomorrow." Usually at that point I feel a twinge in my stomach.

I recently did something special for an office mate and felt foolish when I heard laughter after I made what I thought was a helpful comment. I felt a twinge in my stomach.

I go to my Tai Chi class and don't tell the instructors that I feel frustrated because I haven't learned anything new in three weeks. I feel a twinge in my stomach.

For me, my stomach twinge means that something is going on that is not good for me. It may be procrastination, overbooking, or lack of appropriate assertiveness. I believe that if I don't pay careful attention to my internal monitoring system I will be off my wellness track and not available in a meaningful way to myself or to my clients.

This I Believe... from Cathy Hauer, MFT

...That every therapist wants to do the best for themselves and their clients. That we really do have good intentions, and that our best intentions aren't always enough.

I believe that we need to check in with ourselves often: am I taking good care of my physical, psychological, intellectual, and spiritual health? Am I getting needs met in my circles of friends, colleagues, family, and companion animals?

I believe that when we get off track, whether by a little bit or a lot, we can make a course-correction. We may have to do some soul-searching, we may have to ask for help, we may have to make some changes, but I do believe we can do it.

Most important, I believe in the basic goodness of all people. We all swim in this amazing, crazy, stunning thing called "our life, the world, these times." So, when I believe in all of our basic goodness, I can be compassionate when I miss my mark, or when I worry you might be missing your mark...and then I'll know what to do. I believe that our interdependence demands that we help each other swim back to the safe and healing shore.

Alice Sklar, MFT, is in private practice in Los Altos; Mary Jo Trusso, MFT, is in private practice in San Jose; Cathy Hauer, MFT, is in private practice in San Mateo. All three are long-time members of the SCV-CAMFT Therapist Well-Being Committee.